The end of the season...

Though it was a short and very non-competitive season, Jenna finished up with her usual style and panache. The last game was played against her own teammates as there were not enough kidlets present to play for the other team, so a couple got transferred. Luckily, it wasn't like Dodgeball in High School where the captains had to pick the ones to come over to the other team. That could have been bad.

The worst part about this situation is the fact that they were all wearing the same color uniforms, so the game was truly a disaster of epic proportions. By the time the little ones ran down the court each time they had forgotten which kid was on which team. It was anarchy. I should also admit here that I forgot which kid was on which team as well because The Hannimal was busy with the fire alarm on the gymnasium door. All of these things preclude me from having a truly detailed report on this outing.

I will say that this game lasted forever. I have no idea who the timekeeper was, but it became increasingly obvious that he/she needed a new watch because I know those kids ran up and down that court without scoring for no fewer than 45 minutes. It really doesn't sound like a lot of time, but trust me --- if you were there, you would understand. It seemed like days.

The highlight of the game was Jenna's truly being convinced that the pizza party was right after the game. She came over to where I was sitting and informed me that she needed to stop playing in the game because her stomach was hurting and she wanted to be able to eat pizza at the party. I told her that the party was in four days.

Jenna, true to form, did not believe me and so the next time she ran down the court while her teammates were playing basketball, Jenna left the action in order to verify with the coach that the party was, indeed, right after the game.

The look on the coach's face was, at once, disbelief, amusement, anger, and pity. It seems like a lot of emotion to be having at once, but if any person on earth can cause all of these reactions at once, it's my Jenna.

Her disappointment was palpable and truly affected the rest of her performance during the game. For the last 7 or so minutes (in mommy time, that's 4 hours), Jenna walked, nay sauntered up and down the court. Had I known that a lack of potential pizza could cause such disdain, I would never have believed it. To be sure, I would petition the FedEx Forum to shut down the Coletta's in an attempt to render the Tigers' future opponents practically immobile. She looked as if she had lost her best friend and was searching for her across a vast desert of thick mud. Regardless of the accuracy of my similes, she looked as if she was actually moving in slow motion.

I had no idea that the only reason she had been running all season was for pizza. Everything makes so much more sense now. It's as if a giant light has been shone on the entire season.

Jenna was searching for her moment. That one unattainable moment wherein she would find herself with a completion like no other...for Jay Gatsby, it was Daisy...for my Jenna, it was Pepperoni.

Who's to say which is more noble? At least Jenna eventually got Pepperoni whereas, Gatsby got shot by a madman after losing Daisy yet again.

It does make one wonder though.

Final score: Blue 10, Blue 2

And because Coach Daddy and I have no idea which team Jenna was on, it may have been a win or it may have been a loss. We will never know.

In our book, however, and as is generally the case with all sports of the non-competitive variety, all of the Blues are winners.

And my Jenna is no exception.

In an odd turn of events...

Team Maroon is on a two game winning streak. Things have happened so quickly around here what with the endorsements and all that I haven't had a chance to update in awhile. My sincere apologies to all.

In all seriousness, Jenna's team has really turned around in the past few weeks. I have witnessed dribbling, passing, shooting and no fewer than three baskets attempted and made. Jenna has been kind enough (or distracted enough) to leave the cleaning lady alone and she has only been averaging one full on 'lay down at center court' move per game - down from 3.5 which was her average early on in the season. "Baby steps," I repeat to myself. "Baby steps."

Other colloquial phrases that are commonly used this season include, but are not limited to:

Slow and steady wins the race.
Patience is a virtue.
Give a man a fish and something something something.
Why aren't women made with builds capable of concealing a flask?

At any rate, Jenna's shooting is absolutely horrifying, but she does not know this nor would this knowledge stop her from trying. She has a tendency to throw the ball straight up - - - from wherever she might be in relation to the basket. She has hit two coaches at center court...twice. However, in her defense, the coaches should really pay more attention to a six year old with questionable motor skills weilding a basketball.

My favorite of her new basketball tactics is to announce where she is going to pass the ball. Columbo, she's not:

MIKAYLA!! CATCH!!!!!!!!!!

Sadly, nine times out of ten, Jenna has already thrown the ball straight up into the air before she has gotten the announcement off her chest. As one can imagine, I spend much of my time watching the game with my hands covering my eyes. Sometimes, I'm scared to look and I will admit, it alters the amount of information that I can correctly relay.

Having said all of this, Jenna's running has improved by a mile. She is super fast now that she has regressed to once again, running like a horse.

I forgot - the other colloquialism often running through my head during games:

You've got two coconuts and you're banging them together...

Which would be something...because then I could have a pina colada - if I could find a place to hide my flask.

Tuesday's match-up features a fiercely competitive navy blue team trying to break our winning streak. One of Navy's team members cries a lot, so we may have an advantage there; however, Jenna is a very sensitive sort and one cannot rule out the possibility of this being a ploy on the other team's part to take out one of our team members.

Then again, the one that cries might just be crying in anticipation of getting the stew knocked out of her by one of Jenna's wayward shot attempts. I doubt Jenna could throw the basketball into the Grand Canyon.

It isn't if you win or lose, it's how you play the game...

I saved that one for the last, because I'm not entirely sure if that makes me feel better or worse...